23 December 2019 – Intense Day

Today was really intense – I worked 10 hours – 5 on the CBT course and 5 on the Upwork job. It was really demanding, especially considering I also went out for 3 hours – went shopping.. I really don’t know how time passed by so quickly. I can account for 13 hours – what happened for the other 3?! Overall, it was a very productive day, a bit intense and demanding though.

Today I learned to be prepared for the unexpected! I am grateful for the work I did and for the choices I made.

Have a merry day!

9-15 December 2019 – Realignment

This week I really took the time to heal and rest. I got a cold that made sure of that. By the end of the week it managed to mostly clear out though. On Friday I worked 8 hours on the Upwork job – really dedicated myself to that. On Saturday I attended the ToastMasters secret santa party – and it was AMAZING! I had the best time. It was an organized event that was similar to the meetings. It was really great. I will attend next year for sure!

Today I studied CBT for 3 hours, I watched 2 movies, I played, I cooked.

This week I learned to enjoy life more and to give people a chance. I am grateful for the great time I had, for the beautiful heart-warming experiences, for healing and for the wonderful connections.

I wish you a week full of opportunities and achievements!

6-7-8 December 2019 – Recalibrating

I mostly took these days off and rested as much as I could. I’ve had some emotional struggles, but I eventually managed to get over them. I got to spend a lot of time with my family – playing and talking about various things – it was nice.

Today I went through 5 hours of the CBT course. It was really nice to work at it again and actually process the information. I missed it to some extent. Today I got reminded how I am the one that sets the priorities in my life – I am the one who chooses what I want to do. It is difficult to remember this somehow throughout interactions.. but I’m getting through it – with a little help from my friends. Today I also spent an hour designing some characters for an animation. The process had some obstacles and I decided to stop for the day. Maybe I’ll continue the work tomorrow. I generally feel that I am slowly integrating the insights from last weekend, from the psychology course. It’s interesting how great I feel that weekend and how difficult it is to integrate it the following days.. Maybe if I would try to do it conciously it would go faster? I currently find it difficult to let go of my emotions from the past. Seeing how my day-to-day actions are influenced by my past makes me sad. It makes me realize that I really have to work to learn to let go on the spot – when the past events/emotions get activated..

Today I learned that I have my own rhythm and I really need to remind myself of boundries. I am grateful for getting rest and connections.

I wish you a day full of achievements and insights.

5 December 2019 – Working Day

Today I worked most day – and I also complained a lot. It seems that since the psychology course last weekend, I do this a lot. It’s so challenging to integrate everything in a short time. I managed to cook a potato-leek soup today – it was average – nothing compared to one I tested years ago.. But it was ok nonetheless.

Today I learned how quickly thoughts slip through our mind – and how difficult it is to catch them and get them back! I swear.. sometimes… just.. I get the most life changing thought and it just disappears in thin air exactly before I give it attention.. Today was a day of personal truths – and I am grateful for that. Also for finding the strength within myself to admit some things I do and getting to spend time with my partner.

Have a creative and motivated Friday!

3 December 2019 – Toasty Day

Today I got officially accepted into ToastMasters. I cooked lunch today and served it with my partner. After attending the ToastMasters meeting, we went at a restaurant and had a nice chat with the group. I worked a bit for the Upwork job and watched some episodes.

Today I learned that I can socialize with a group and respect my boundries and even be confident! I am grateful for the interactions of the day, for the great food and for the work I got done.

Have a productive day full of achievements!

2 December 2019 – The Food Photos Are Back!

Today was like a story – it had a wonderful introduction and conclusion, but a mediocre content overall. I got up and prepared lunch for myself – something that hasn’t happened for a long time. I had a chat with my aunt over Skype while serving coffee. I talked a bit with my partner and then proceeded with work. After 3 hours of work, I somehow got mixed into drama.. after 2 to 3 hours of pointless arguing – expressing my repressed anger and the things that built up and I can no longer ignore, I finally got to an understanding with my partner. I then watched a whole season of some series while eating sweets.. I just couldn’t really stop myself.. I then worked another hour, woke my sister up to encourage her to get to the faculty on time and reviewed the work I did last week and last month. Seems that I worked 153 hours last month! Pretty good I would say.

Today I learned that hanging out with people that have a low energy can really hit me hard and trigger my repressed emotions. I am grateful for the work I did today, for getting to a conclusion in the conversation with my partner and for managing to get myself up. I really loved the beginning of this day and I want many more mornings like this.

I wish you a day of productivity and confidence!

1 December 2019 – Now I Know That I Am

I went to the psychology course today and found out surprizing things about my boundries – about how tiny they are and almost inexisting. I only defend my boundries when I can’t stand the pain anymore, not when the pain starts.. It was interesting to discover this and relate it into my own life – the family life and work. I discovered that I don’t speak up – I let the others find a solution for me, even if I know what the best solution is for myself. As a result of this, I decided to observe myself and say a strong STOP at the point where the pain begins – prevent it from eating me alive! The other thing I learned today is how to integrate myself in a group and make it all homogeneous. I really have that resource in me – I just have to trust it! I went to the woods with my sister and Sheeba afterwards, for a session of grounding and for completely integrating the things I learned the past 3 days. I also got my ToastMasters account today and I managed to choose a path and actually investigate an assignment. I couldn’t decide between ‘Innovative Planning’ and ‘Effective Coaching’, but after some hard thought, I chose based on instinct – the coaching. I spent the night with my sister and partner, chatting and sharing a connection. I am pleased of how things worked out and how wonderful everything was.

Today I learned about my boundries and interpersonal relations. I am grateful for the beliefs that surficed today and for learning the most meaningful word for myself :

Faith

I wish you a day full of faith, a day of total alignment and getting things done.

27 November 2019 – Just Work

Today I worked for 8 hours on the Upwork project. I managed to complete the work and send some demo videos to the client. I still have to deploy the app and wait for feedback, but there’s time. I got another offer in the meantime – from the same client – they seem to be enjoying my work. Somehow I got to this point where I focus my attention in a single direction.. and it is different from the one I had in mind. I’m doing the leg-work so it’s a good thing overall. I spent some time with my sister today and we even took a long walk with Sheeba outside through the freezing cold. I also managed to squeeze in a long break for a chat with my partner. Today I felt good on average, but I am overwhelmed by the troubled sleep I got the last few days. I am planning for a beautiful sleep-how-much-you-want day for tomorrow. I hope there will still be light when I wake up.

Today I learned that I can feel stretched too thin by work even if I find it overall engaging. This made me realize that I should be more careful with my time management. I am grateful for another successful day, for the interactions I got, for the paid work and for being at peace within myself.

I wish you a day of relaxation and inner joy!

26 November 2019 – Online Shopping – The Old Nemesis

Today I worked a bit on the Upwork project and later in the evening I got a new offer for another. I went out to the ToastMasters meeting and I held a speech I am proud of. This time I actually spoke with confidence and I had things to say! I am proud of my progress. I went out with some members at a restaurant afterwards at my sister’s request. It was interesting – not engaging – just interesting. I then got home and after showing my sister some necklaces, I got into browsing online.. 4 hours and 2 orders later I decided to end the day.

Today I learned that sometimes it’s better to leave space for some mystery. I basically judged the people based on their behavior – just because I was so uncomfortable. Today I am grateful for my progress as a speaker, for my work and for handling my behavior towards the outside world in a civilised fashion.

I wish you a day full of getting things done!

25 November 2019 – Ordinary Working Day

Today I worked on the Upwork job for 7 hours and I continued the exercises from the CBT course for 3 hours. I also spent some time with my sister and watched some episodes.

Today I learned about some mistaken beliefs I have and I actually managed to find some alternative thoughts for them. I am grateful for the work I did and for the focus I had.

Have a great day with meaningful interactions!